Umm I'm too high to move.
I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
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