WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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