Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
Randomize
