so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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