i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
Randomize
