i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
