normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
Randomize
