Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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