Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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