You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Sex in the backyard? Check.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize