I feel like abortions should bother me more
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I still have a little drunk in my system
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Randomize
