If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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