he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
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