she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Randomize
