Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
These tits shall not be calmed
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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