Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I just want to make out with him forever
Help me help you realize you are a moron
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
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