i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
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