The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
