i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
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