She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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