hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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