genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
