smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
3 2 1 whiskey
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
