the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
