I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
i just had sex bonerless
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
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