You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
