her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
