She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
