Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize
