So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
25 Hilarious ‘Sex Clubs’ You Should Try To Join
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
These 23 People Had Crazy Sex With Complete Strangers
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone