Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
It was confusing and full of hummus
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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