Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
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