I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
sick fucks of a feather flock together
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
Randomize
