so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
