just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
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