I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
