adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
