"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
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We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
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that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
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