She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Randomize
