I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Randomize
