he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
I forget how to act sober
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize