I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Randomize