So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
