so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize