i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Randomize
