i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Randomize