he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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