I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
Randomize
