youre lurking in front of me
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Randomize
