well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
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He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
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